This Week’s Theology

/ Kimberly Gordon / 1 Comment

We have grown ever more impatient with God. If you’ve read the Old Testament, you’ll see that the people who walked with God, though not perfect, did it with faith and great patience. People who received promises from God held on to those promises, often for many years and were hailed as heroes of faith, having never received in this life the fullness of what was promised, but still believing it (Hebrews 11). 

Our generation, on the other hand, receives a word from God, and we are joyful and expectant all that day. Our faith is great! Then by evening, we start to wane. Over the next few days, we battle doubt, waffling between disappointment and anger, wondering if we really heard God, and if we did, why He isn’t doing what he said He would do. Instead of questioning our character, we question His. We doubt His Word and His love for us. We wonder:

How does my theology need to change based on what I’ve seen of God this week?

Maybe we don’t consciously think that. But our thoughts, words and actions all reflect it. Instead of going to God and asking Him to reveal Himself to us and show us the truth in His Word of who He is and who we are to Him, we decide that our situation is the final word on who God really is. And we get hurt, offended, disappointed, angry, and bitter. And then instead of holding on to a promise in faith, we release what was given to us, something that was supposed to be our inheritance, because we gave up too soon. 

I can tell you what you might be thinking now. I held on way longer than a week. I’ve been praying and waiting for years and nothing has happened. I feel that. But let’s be a little more honest. Nothing has happened? Or how you interpreted what God said hasn’t fully come to fruition? There are things that my husband and I have been praying and waiting for for years that we have not seen yet. But what has happened is that we have grown in faith and spiritual maturity. God has shown us more of Himself and drawn us to Him. We have unity in our marriage. There is spiritual fruit in our lives and family. 

When God gives us a promise, a word to hold on to, here is what we think will happen: God gives the promise, we are READY for the fullness of it spiritually, emotionally, mentally, etc. And then, in several hours or, at the most, several days, we will see it come to pass. We will rejoice and all the glory will go to God as He elevates us to whatever position He told us we’d hold. 

Here’s what actually happens: God gives us a promise, a word to hold onto in faith. We begin to pray for that thing to happen in joyful expectation. But instead of bringing it too soon, God brings us nearer to Him. We get disappointed, disillusioned. We have to work through being angry at God, and a lot of sin and character issues come up in us that we then have to confess and repent to God. He transforms and heals us, one day at a time, one hurt at a time, one issue at a time. We start to realize His presence is the promise and the gift, and even though we can still hold on to the word He gave us, when we pray, we pray for it to happen according to His will, in His timing. We recognize that we weren’t ready for that promise when He gave it. He continues to work on our healing and growth as we come to Him with each new hope, fear, hurt… eventually we start to pray, that even if that thing never happens, we will trust Him because we know who He is and we are submitted to Him. We are confident in His love and kindness to us. He is more to us than the thing He promised. We actually believe that what He is doing in and through our lives is for our good and His glory. 

And then. 

What happens is better and different and way beyond what we imagined. Even the hard parts are filled with joy because the Lord is in it and has led us into it and is sustaining us through it.

And when we look at the people who walked with God in the Bible, we see that when they had been tested and refined and really knew God closely, that’s when they were ready to take hold of what God had promised. And it was never how they thought it would look at the beginning. So my encouragement is this: let your theology be guided by God and not by you, hold on to hope, pray in faith. And the love of God will guide you with joy, in peace, as you live each day in truth. 

Safe People

/ Kimberly Gordon / Leave a comment

“I trust you; you’re safe.” 

What do those words mean in the context of relationship? I think often when we say someone is safe and can be trusted, we mean that they think like we do, that they won’t judge us for what we’re telling them, that they’ll tell us the truth (as long as it isn’t judgy!), and they won’t hurt our feelings. At that rate, no one in our lives will be “safe” very long. And when no one is safe, we’ll stop sharing our hearts, what we’re going through, what we’re feeling and experiencing and how we’re growing in the Lord. We become isolated, an echo chamber, where anxiety develops because we’re afraid of what people would think of us if they knew our depths. 

Maybe you don’t deal with this- if you don’t, pray for the rest of us, haha. 

I think what we really mean, what we really long for it to mean as we mature, is that a safe person is a peer or mentor who is humble, compassionate, and regards us as an image bearer of the Lord. They will pray before responding. It means that they believe the best of us and want God’s best for us, even when it doesn’t make sense, it’s hard to understand, or it seems foolish (when has God ever led His people through anything that made sense?!). It also means they will speak the truth, out of love, and that sometimes it will hurt, because they are kind, but not worried about being nice. 

Safe people drive us back to the Lord. When the people we confide in don’t agree with something we think, believe, or do, we have to take those things back to Him in prayer. But the outcome here isn’t isolation. It’s testimony. We share a hard situation. Someone gives feedback, and we realize when someone disagrees with us that getting hurt isn’t the end of the world. So we go back to the Lord who speaks to us, and we either change our mind about the thing we shared or grow more confident in it. Then we share with more people what the Lord is bringing us through, and others going through similar situations recognize the Lord and don’t feel so alone. They speak up, now willing to share. Our faith is built. Their faith is built. We end up trusting the Lord more and living in community with our hearts open even though we realize people will disagree with us and how we’re walking with the Lord. Know why? No one else has your specific identity, and the Lord intimately deals with all of us to bring us close to Him and to grow our faith. 

In being open, we learn compassion, not judgment. God is not confined to our thinking of Him and what we’ve seen Him work in our own lives. We learn humility and get to see more of God. We learn to be safe people. People who trust the Lord’s work in others and are willing to believe the best. 

So who are your safe people? Are you one? 

On Speaking the Truth, Part 2

/ Kimberly Gordon / Leave a comment

Last time I shared my thoughts on Christians being silent where we really need to speak up. 

Today, after spending several days in Job in my daily Bible reading, I want to share on the opposite side of that: I think we’re too loud where we need to learn to be silent. 

Here’s a short overview of the first half of Job in case it’s been awhile (or never) since you’ve read it: 

Job is recognized by God as being a righteous man who fears God. Satan, the accuser, recognizes this and asks to destroy all he has to see if he’ll still fear God. God agrees, except satan can’t kill Job. Satan goes forth, killing all of Job’s children and his livelihood and afflicting him with sickness. Job’s friends come to him to mourn with him, but because Job won’t admit to any sin that has caused this, eventually these friends speak out, saying they “heard from a spirit” all these ways Job has sinned and is in the wrong and needs to repent. They say the spirit told them that’s why all this trouble has come, and that there will be more if he doesn’t repent. 

This is where we need to learn silence. These friends assume the “spirit” they heard from was the spirit of God telling them these things, and that because of that they need to tell Job what it said. There are some problems with this. First, the spirits these men heard from never identify themselves as the Lord! Second, the Lord does not tell these men to tell Job what this spirit has said. And third, what these spirits have said to the men counters what we know God Himself has already said about Job (even though these men don’t know that at the time)! 

I fully believe that we as believers can hear from the Holy Spirit. I believe we are led by Him. Romans 8: 14 says that the sons of God are led by the Spirit of God. Elsewhere the Word says that the Spirit will lead us into all truth (John 16:13). I know God speaks to us. However, if we think we have insight into someone else’s life, I firmly believe that discernment is necessary. We need to discern whether or not what we think we feel is actually from the Lord. Does it sound like His voice, His character? Is it something He would speak over one of His beloved creation? Or is it something that is coming from our own sin nature, from jealousy, or even from a demonic spirit whispering to us? Discerning Who we are hearing from is of first importance. Then, if we really believe the insight we have IS from God, then we need to pray and ask the Lord about what we have been given insight on, to see whether or not it needs to be spoken, or whether that insight has been given only so that we can intercede for the person about which it has been given. 

I think too often we speak too soon “words from God” without stopping to discern whether or not it’s really His voice and what we’re supposed to do with it if it is. 

Let us be careful what we speak to each other when we think we have insight. Let us not guess at secret sin, but only call out sin that has been seen or confessed. Then we do have a responsibility to speak truth from the Word of God and call our brother or sister to repentance (James 5:19-20).  

Let us be discerning in speaking the truth in love to one other in Christ. 

On Speaking the Truth

/ Kimberly Gordon / 1 Comment

Are you ever afraid to say something for fear of being wrong? I am. It feels like there’s so much pressure in our culture right now to stay silent, or to say something so generalized that you’re not really saying anything at all. Truth has a bad rap, because heaven forbid you offend someone by speaking something true for you that isn’t true for them. We have this mindset that there isn’t any universal truth anymore. And for sure no spiritual truth. Like, maybe I see that as a tree, but you say it’s a mountain. Or I see a woman, made in God’s image, but you see a cat. Or what if I say I believe Jesus is the only way to have a relationship with the true God? And not just that I believe that, but that it’s the Truth. Would you say that’s fine for me but not for you? OR that’s fine but that I shouldn’t push my beliefs (merely by speaking them) onto someone else? Are we not allowed to speak our minds anymore? Say what’s on our hearts? Are we not allowed to call people to repentance, or call brothers and sisters to account? Some days I feel like I’m going crazy when I look at our world, when I think of relationships I have, even with believing friends, and I think How can you believe what the Bible says and hold these beliefs about the world? 

And, to be bolder, Black lives do matter. Do you know what else matters? Every other life. Of every other skin color. And those forming in the womb, at any stage. Removing a living baby from the womb and killing it is wrong. 

I’m tired of the fear of man being allowed to control how I speak, and that I stop myself from forming or speaking a full thought in order to not offend someone. I need to speak the truth, because that is what God has called me to. But more important than writing it here, or on social media, is the willingness to speak the truth in conversation, especially with people who don’t agree with me, so that we can work to understand one another and still have relationship. 

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Let’s stop this awkward silence. Let’s stop not talking about everything we don’t agree with with people. If we don’t, pretty soon we won’t talk to each other at all, and that’s exactly what our spiritual enemies want: for us to live isolated rather that in real relationship and community that God made us for. 

Deconstructed

/ Kimberly Gordon / Leave a comment

If you’ve ever gone through a season where you feel like who you are, like everything you believe, is being taken apart, piece by piece, and laid out in what seems like a broken mess, you know how painful it is. 

There are times when we’ve lived in something so long, God has to take us apart to get it out. Like a knife or a watch that needs a complete going over, sometimes He takes us gently in hand, and undoes every piece, looking it over, fixing what’s broken, cleaning things out, before putting us back together in even better working order. But during that process, of feeling ripped apart, of feeling unmoored with nothing to hold onto, it’s easy to forget it’s a process that won’t last forever. It’s easy to forget Who’s handling us. It’s easy to get lost in fear, doubt, hopelessness, depression, and be stuck in anger and bitterness, especially when that process lasts longer than we want it to, or think we can handle. 

But, if you’re there, or you’ve been there and lost sight of what God was doing and got stuck, turn back. Remember who you are. Remember who your Father is. Open your hands and heart and decide to trust Him with the work. Let Him finish what He’s started in you. 

The Lord reveals our brokenness to us to bring healing, not hopelessness. Decide to release what’s broken to Him instead of clinging to the brokenness and pain like it’s your identity. It isn’t. 

Wholeness is your identity. Healed is your identity. Holy is your identity. Free is your identity. 

To live in the truth, we have to decide to let Him finish the cleansing and the healing, to trust Him with the pain of it, the mess of it, and let Him put us back together, more fit for the work He made us to do. 

Waiting

/ Kimberly Gordon / Leave a comment

I don’t think I ever met someone who likes waiting. But we do it our whole lives. As kids we wait for dinner. Wait for Christmas. Then we wait to drive. Wait to get married, have kids, land a dream job, buy the house, etc. etc. We wait for things that matter. So I don’t know why I’m surprised when I tell God I’m ready for something, or I want to move into something, and He mostly says, “Wait.” I hope I’m growing in this, to be patient and trust Him. But I would still like to move faster than God wants me to sometimes (okay, pretty much all the time). 

Last week I had this vision of a word He was giving me, and I got really excited and was like, “Yes, God, I’m ready for that!” To which very clearly He said, “Wait. You’re not ready because you haven’t learned that yet.” If He let me give a word to a bunch of people without really having learned it, it wouldn’t be real- it would be my theory. But someday, when I’ve really learned what He said to me, by living it, I’m going to look back and remember when He spoke and be able to encourage myself and others to wait on the Lord, because He accomplishes everything in His perfect timing. Wait on the Lord, because we have to learn through living so it’s more than theory. Wait on the Lord, because in the waiting we’re learning trust and submission as habits, so as the audience or the calling or the job or the whatever gets bigger, we stay grounded in Jesus, the Word of Truth. Wait on the Lord, because He’s protecting you from carrying too heavy a burden before you’re strong enough to shoulder it with Him.

So, don’t rush it. Trust the Lord and receive what He’s placed right in front of you in this season. Be faithful. And wait with me. 

Self Care

/ Kimberly Gordon / 1 Comment

…and my current fav YouTube workout channel!

Photo by Elina Fairytale on Pexels.com

Self-care is not selfish.

That might be a given for you, or it might be something you really struggle with. For me, that belief comes and goes in the mess of mommy-hood. I can see a positive difference in how I’m able to take care of our family and reach out to others when I’m filled up.

One of the ways I have to daily take care of myself is by working out. I have to make myself do something hard, so I can be strong and in shape physically, but also to release emotional tension and clear my head. When I work out, I release pent up emotions and energy so they don’t come out in unhealthy ways. I’ve made myself do something hard, which helps me to practice self-control in other hard things (like, not eating all the chocolate in the pantry, even if it is Askinosie– not sponsor, just a fav).

This week I want to highlight one of my favorite trainers on YouTube- ActionJacquelyn. She’s also on insta as @actionjacquelyn and even has her own app that you can try for free with a whole workout community and new workouts every week.

I found Jacquelyn’s channel looking for some barre workouts, but she also does Yoga, pilates, and HIIT, along with some gentler workouts. Her positivity flows from a place of thankfulness, and her attitude has ben a factor in reminding to be thankful for the season I’m in now and embrace it instead of comparing it with past seasons of life.

So, working out is just one way to self-care. But what else fills you up so you can keep growing and living well?

I challenge you to think through what you need to be a better version of you, and then to find a way to start doing it. When you take care of you, you come at your work and responsibilities from a healthy fullness instead of running on empty plus a few shots of caffeine. And that means instead of being draining to the people around you, you can bring life. Take care of yourself. It’s the best way to love your people.

Worship

/ Kimberly Gordon / Leave a comment

Worship is warfare. But not against one another.

We as believers come together to give praise, honor and glory to the Lord of Creation- giving worship to whom it’s due- and in giving praise, we take ground. We push back the enemy. God opens our eyes to areas where we’ve given Satan room to move in our lives and invites us to let God take those areas back.

But it’s so easy to be distracted. Is anyone looking? What will they think if I get on my knees? Or cry? Or jump? Can I walk the aisles praying for our church? Will anyone hear me and think it’s weird if I’m praying in tongues? Am I being distracting? Sometimes we use those things as an excuse to not follow the Spirit’s leading.

Recently I’ve been challenged to step out more in worship to give people the gift of going second. This has been an almost constant battle for me. I feel engaged. I get into the songs. I make sure my heart is aligned with God and open to how He wants to work. And then I want to move. I don’t want to stay in my place- I need space. I want to dance. But it’s not just for me. I need to move because I need to pray. For our team. Over the people. I want to walk the aisles with my hands stretched out, pouring my heart out in intercession.

But many times I don’t because I feel like I would be too distracting. Voices in my head war against one another as one tells me, Make yourself small. You don’t want people to notice you. You want people to be able to focus on God, while the other quietly responds, Yes. But can my worship direct their eyes and hearts to God? Can I help to bring more freedom into worship by giving them the gift of going second?

Worship is warfare.

The battle is in our minds and spirits. And sometimes we need to do battle by making our bodies do something in the physical that shifts something in the spiritual. We take spiritual ground when we take physical ground by responding to God with our voices, our hands, our feet, when we worship with all of our hearts.

So, I’ll put myself out there. I’ll respond to how to Sprit is leading me to worship God. I’ll move. And if I step out and follow the Spirit’s leading, then maybe that will free you to believe you can step out, too. And together we can take ground for the Kingdom of heaven.

Rest

/ Kimberly Gordon / Leave a comment
Photo by Thought Catalog on Pexels.com

When I heard God say that this year was to come from a place of rest, I was confused, and a little disappointed to have that be my word for the year. “Rest” didn’t seem like taking ground, or mighty battles being won, or any big miracles coming through giant leaps forward. Also, I didn’t think it was really possible. I mean, I have four kids 7 and under, and I homeschool three of them, so my workload isn’t super restful.

Last Sunday, Paul Bergin taught at The Belonging Co and that word “rest” got more clarification. I realized that my work was to come from a place of trust in Christ’s completed work. When I trust in Christ’s completed work and victory, I realize that my work isn’t coming from feeling like I have to keep up, or like everything depends on me. Instead I can work from rest.

The Lord has been speaking to me about what He means by “rest”. He means instead of doing things my own way in my own strength, I am to work from His power made perfect in my weakness. He means instead of striving , I am to be content with being loved by Him, filled and clothed with His power and grace. He means instead of resting my faith in my circumstances or surroundings, I am to rest in the power of God (1 Corinthians 2:3-5).

So, what He is telling me isn’t, “Hey, take some time off.” He is telling me I needed to rest in Him in order to allow His power to rest on me and work through me. Then I can be more effective in the work He gives me to do because I’m not striving in my own strength but working with His.

Rest begets readiness.

As I rest in the Lord, I am ready, in His strength, for whatever He’s assigned for my day. Rest makes me powerful. As I choose to rest and trust God with my days, I release my grip over my work and allow God to pour the fullness of Himself into me and through me as I work.

I’m realizing that for me this year, rest is taking ground. Rest does mean mighty victories. Rest will result in miracles and giant leaps forward in faith. Because when I rest in Him, God is working.